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we shall be rightly served if it obtains us a kick . Now , if in private it is not yet thbught quite doing the glorious thing to entrap your neighbour ., or to divert , with dexterous sleight of hand , the bread from his mouth ( like some penny or five-pound conjurer ) , whilst you deposit in it only the wrong end of your walking-stick ; surely , in
your public capacity , and when you are trusted as a servant of the nation , so sworn , over and over again , to guard its interests , it is something next to guilt—if it be not guilt itself—to shuffle , and job , and cut , villanously , and contrive , until all your patronage has been sifted into a great basin of gold just to put away in your own private corner-cupboard . We speak to the public
Catilines!—sellers of their country . But there are others , we think , sometimes more dangerous and intolerable , who sit so snugly and hug each other on that long bench of public patronage . Fools abound—incapables—great talkers and little doers—unwieldy Gogs and Magogs of conceit , with their large foolish heads wagging from side to side , winking with an air of wondrous wisdom ;—men
with an exaggerated osfrontis , on which is written all the cleverness of Parliament , but with a walnut of a heart;—big with the little , little with the big , placing their gripe upon the coat-skirt of any one before them , whose gift it is to lift them yet higher up the ladder of public advantage , or , Mawworm-like , to drag them after them through the golden gates of that sunshiny heaven of the Court .
Dull wheatsheaves , to be thrashed out of all the corn they have to yield , in the hope of dropping it to purpose , provided the hand be vigorous ( and jewelled ) that is flourished against them , and the brow-beating or cajoling flail be well applied , relentless , and tipped with gold . Indeed , my good friend and reader—yourself a Member of Parliament or hoping to be one , or wishing something through
the interference of one , and therefore all the more qualified to apprehend the justice of my political painting—indeed , my likelyto-be-prosperous , because pushing , friend , there are many placed upright upon that purple-coloured bench in the Lords , or nodding from that quarter-mile of crimson cushion in the House of Underlings , that are inane woolbags . It is the easiest thing in the world
to acquire a reputation for talent , provided you look occasionally fierce and hold your tongue . Say you are a great man—if you have money in your pocket—and people will believe you : they will stare at first ; but never mind that ! Take our advice , and only insist , and you will soon be so great as to only want a pedestal to step up upon . Men see a whole world of possibilities in you if you know how to sit at the top of your table and have a gilt knocker to your door .
Gentlemen having the advantage of a bald head , or w ho have acquired the accomplishment of snapping authoritatively , have got into Parliament , ere this , solely through the baskctfuls of envelopes which they have sent empty away . Bishops have fluttered in lawn , like white summer clouds ; rising men in the Church have grasped crooks before they were aware of it ; and ascetic Deans , whose only sackcloth has been that in which tho coals were contained which served
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software.
Untitled Article
we shall be rightly served if it obtains us a kick . Now , if in private it is not yet thbught quite doing the glorious thing to entrap your neighbour ., or to divert , with dexterous sleight of hand , the bread from his mouth ( like some penny or five-pound conjurer ) , whilst you deposit in it only the wrong end of your walking-stick ; surely , in
your public capacity , and when you are trusted as a servant of the nation , so sworn , over and over again , to guard its interests , it is something next to guilt—if it be not guilt itself—to shuffle , and job , and cut , villanously , and contrive , until all your patronage has been sifted into a great basin of gold just to put away in your own private corner-cupboard . We speak to the public
Catilines!—sellers of their country . But there are others , we think , sometimes more dangerous and intolerable , who sit so snugly and hug each other on that long bench of public patronage . Fools abound—incapables—great talkers and little doers—unwieldy Gogs and Magogs of conceit , with their large foolish heads wagging from side to side , winking with an air of wondrous wisdom ;—men
with an exaggerated osfrontis , on which is written all the cleverness of Parliament , but with a walnut of a heart;—big with the little , little with the big , placing their gripe upon the coat-skirt of any one before them , whose gift it is to lift them yet higher up the ladder of public advantage , or , Mawworm-like , to drag them after them through the golden gates of that sunshiny heaven of the Court .
Dull wheatsheaves , to be thrashed out of all the corn they have to yield , in the hope of dropping it to purpose , provided the hand be vigorous ( and jewelled ) that is flourished against them , and the brow-beating or cajoling flail be well applied , relentless , and tipped with gold . Indeed , my good friend and reader—yourself a Member of Parliament or hoping to be one , or wishing something through
the interference of one , and therefore all the more qualified to apprehend the justice of my political painting—indeed , my likelyto-be-prosperous , because pushing , friend , there are many placed upright upon that purple-coloured bench in the Lords , or nodding from that quarter-mile of crimson cushion in the House of Underlings , that are inane woolbags . It is the easiest thing in the world
to acquire a reputation for talent , provided you look occasionally fierce and hold your tongue . Say you are a great man—if you have money in your pocket—and people will believe you : they will stare at first ; but never mind that ! Take our advice , and only insist , and you will soon be so great as to only want a pedestal to step up upon . Men see a whole world of possibilities in you if you know how to sit at the top of your table and have a gilt knocker to your door .
Gentlemen having the advantage of a bald head , or w ho have acquired the accomplishment of snapping authoritatively , have got into Parliament , ere this , solely through the baskctfuls of envelopes which they have sent empty away . Bishops have fluttered in lawn , like white summer clouds ; rising men in the Church have grasped crooks before they were aware of it ; and ascetic Deans , whose only sackcloth has been that in which tho coals were contained which served