Our Model Stage Manager.

lightening m a manner and with a vigour which called forth the remonstrances of the unfortunate captain . The male residents of Broadstairs are seldom visible ; they pass their clays indoors , with a field-glass in one hand and a

glass of another description in the other ; and in the evening they run over to Ramsgate or Margate , while the Broadstairs ladies divide their time between incessant marketing and contemptuously surveying the visitors .

I was lazily surveying' the evidences around me of all these and kindred facts , and reflecting how soon I , Wilson Haulaway , barristor-nt-law , of the Middle Temple , should be torn away

from them to wait for the brief that came not—and well I knew it might never come—when a handful of sand , dexterously propelled into my right ear , recalled me from dreams and meditations to present and prosaic matters .

" Get up , you lazy beggar , and come to the Mum and the full conclave at the pierhead , to jaw over these blessed theatricals . " It was Harry Crauford , and by the Mum he irreverently alluded to his mother , Lady Crauford , my hostess , who had taken a big house at St . Peter's , close by , and had assembled

therein a floating population of young people , of which I then formed part . These were the conclaves mentioned by Harry , and the theatricals so mentioned were a projected performance suggested by the size of the great hall of Calverley , the jilace where the Craufords were staying . Slightly objurgating his

high spirits , and explaining that to stuff a man's ear full of sand is a distinctly primitive and barbaric process of announcing one's presence to a friend , I arose , and joining , him and threading our way through the sand castles ancl fosses and their infant architects , made our way to the pier .

"Morning , sir ; nice day for a sail ! " shouted our favourite boatman , Jim Hiller ( half Broadstairs is called Hillor ) , as we reached the group of toilers ?) of the sea . Going for a sail with us meant also such other agreeable companions as a fowl , a keg of ale , and a bottle of whiskey on board , and was by 110

means to be despised , Jim , and his partner , Ab Young , had a small lugger , the Pearl—she hacl frequently borne us to Deal and Dover ; both were old sailors , and both hacl amiable weaknesses , especially after a good haul . Ab ' s pet luxury on such occasions was to employ other boatmen to row him about ; Jim ' s to

expend much money on aimless journeys in hired carriages , each deeming the use of shanks ' s mare derogatory on festal occasions . The morrow would occasionally find them head-¦ achey , ancl with not a copper between them— -save hot ones . Declining the proffered excursion , we pursued our way to the

pierhead , where wc found the conclave in full cry , and as the majority present were ladies , and all were talking at once , the full strength of their expression was appreciable . There was Lady Crawfurd in the chair , viz ., her own camp stool , and grouped around , her two daughters , Kate and Edith , young

Mrs . Guy Sunnnerley , Captain Newnham , of the Buffs , quartered at Canterbury , and liitle Borlase , whom , of course , everybody called Bootlace , and AVIIO , after one or two ineffectual attempts to stem the title of chaff , had serenely settled down to enjoy that uneuphonious nickname . Lady Crauford was a ,

pretty little woman , young looking , and a first-rate amateur ¦ actress . I myself h . nl won certain renown , but principally in comic parts , for which I had principally to thank Dame Nature , who had lavished on me a bigger 111011 th and more turncd-up

nose than falls to the lot of ordinary man . Of the capabilities of the others I knew nothing , except that Bootlace was no supping terms with nearly every actor in London—and a good many actresses , for the matter of that—which argued nothing as to his proficiency in their business .

Our Model Stage Manager.

lhere were numbers of matters to be battled over and settled—the piece to be selected , the date of its production , the company and the east . "I vote for a historical play , in which Harry can show his talent by doing the alarums and excursions , shouts outside ancl dead bodies on battle fields , " suggested Newnham .

"Or Endijmion , with Mr . Haulaway in the title role , " insinuated Kate .

"Why not Kitiij Lear , Lady Crauford ? " I suggested , in retaliation , " with your daughters as the two shrewish sisters . " "Now be quiet , all of you , " said our directress , holding up a monitory finger . "First of all , this is not going to be pitchforked 011 to the stage anyhow ; we shall have three weeks '

rehearsals . Most faces fell ; amateurs like to take about a tenth of the trouble over their productions that is bestowed on a similar task by experienced professionals .

"Next , " continued Lady Crauford , "I will not have one of the hackneyed old plays which are always being done : School , for Scandal , Plot and i ' assion , ov a Sheep in Wolf * Cloth in ;/ . We must have a uovelfv . "

"Hollo , Haulaway , " cried Harry ; "here ' s your chance for producing that magnum opus I caught you inditing on Tuesdav . You might have carried it about in vain to half the managers in London , whereas here are theatre and compan y all agog for it , "

" Have you really written a play , and , " Oh , do read it tn us , " ancl similar entreaties were hurled at me from all sides , as I stammeringly acknowledged that I had recently been wooing the dramatic muse . Why , by the way , this tendency to stammer and blush over literarv efforts alone ? A man produces a

homemade whip-lash , or a girl a pair of worked slippers , without the least embarrassment ; bnt if once suspected to be guilty of poem , play , or paragraph , we become a mass of confusion and a butt for raillery . I explained that it was a little piece , in two

acts and three scenes , of domestic interest , showing how soon simple country folk were snared into fast London Society , and were eventually glad enough to get back again : its name wns Out of their Element . "

" Very good , " said her ladyship , you shall read your bantling to ns , and if we like it we'll have it . Then about a professional stage-manager . "Oh , mother , " interrupted Kate , remember the last . He was very dirty , got tipsy on thc night , and went away with the best lady ' s maid I ever had . "

"Well , I have written to Moss , the theatrical agent , on the subject , and he has promised us a very paragon . And now the company is dismissed till dinner time . I have to see the stagecarpenter about setting up a stage , ancl yon young Irvings anil Terrys can do as you like for the present . "

A sail in the Pearl , to take tho illustrated paper to the men on the Gull lightship , was proposed , seconded , and carried ; nnd as that piratical craft , danced over the waves the chatter was of my play , its merits and demerits , the capabilities of the company , bnt , above all , surmises as to the appearance and demeanour iii *' Moss , the agent ' s model stage-niaiiager .

Chapter Ii.

CHAPTER II .

At the bottom ot a court , on the south side of the Strand , is a rather rambling old-fashioned tavern of the kind which is dyin <> - out so fast , and this one is under threat of alteration , dec-oration , and improvement . Its principal room contains a semicircular buffet and several chairs , settles , and tables , on one of which are a large number of theatrical newspapers of all dates ; on its walls

Ad00903

CHRISTMASPRESENTSANDNEWYEARSGIFTS. Gold Medal , Paris Exhibition , 1885 . KENDAL&DENT, 106,CHEAPSIDE,E.C,, GoldChainandPresentationWatchMakers, The Kew Royal Observatory have awarded KBNDAL AND DOT Certificates for Excellence in Watches . PATENTEES OF WATCHES FOR THE BLIND , THE DOUBLE DIAL WATCH , & c , A :.:. Makers of the Large Clock at the Inventions Exhibition , 1885 . Buy direct from tlie Manufacturer , and . save So per cent .