Staffordshire.

smaller sums from other Brethren , amounting to upwards of 1 , 000 guineas . It is expected that at least 2 , 000 guineas will be raised in the Province for the Festival .

The Grand Master Of Scotland.

THE GRAND MASTER OF SCOTLAND .

ON Wednesday , 23 rd ult ., the Right Hon . Lord Saltoun M . W . G . M . of Scotland was entertained at a complimentary dinner by the Lodge of Edinburgh ( Mary's Chapel ) , in the Lodge Hall , Hill Street . The toast of the evening was proposed by the Chairman Bro . P . L . Henderson W . M . who , in referring to the eminent

services Lord Saltoun had rendered to the Craft in Scotland , said the Lodge was pleased to greet his Lordship , and to congratulate him upon having retained his ancient privilege of exercising direct superintendence over the Lodges in the metropolitan district .

Lord Saltoun , in reply , assured the Brethren that , while he remained in office , nothing would be done to interfere with their position . He deprecated the idea of what might be called an east versus west feeling in Masonry .

That , he said , was not Masonry . He hoped that both in the east and west they would endeavour to sink anything of the kind , and that the Brethren througout Scotland would work for the general good of the Craft without any sectional feeling .

The Humours Of Advertising.

THE HUMOURS OF ADVERTISING .

( Continued from page 145 . ) NO article on curious advertisements would be complete without the following , which is extracted from a memoir of the late Bev . S . Hawker , of Morweustow . It was written for a small shop window by a Uu ' . oiisniru schoolmaster : —

• i-ioger Giles , rtuigin , Parish Clark , and Skulemaster , Groser , and ILiach-rUker , Respectably hinforms ladys and gentley that he drors teef wiu . out wateing a minit , applies laches every nour , blisters on the lowest tarms , and visicks for a penny peace . He sells God-fathers Kordales , kuts korns , bunyons , dokters bosses , clips donkies wance a month , and undertakes to luke arter every bodies nayls by the ear . Juseharp , penny wissels , brass kanelstics , fryingpans , and other moosikal hinstrumints , hat grately

reydooced tigers . Young ladys and gentelmen lames their grammar and langeudge in the purtiest manner , also grate care taken oft * their morrels and spellin . Also zarm-singing , tayching the base vial , and all other zorts of vancywork squadrils , pokers , weazils , and all country dances tort at home and abroad at perfekshun . Perfumery and znuff , in all its branches . As times is cruel bad , I begs tell ey that i his just beginned to sell all sorts of stashonary ware , cox , hens , vouls , pigs and all other kinds of poultry .

Blakin-brishes , herrins , coles , skrubbin-brishes , tryykel godly bukes and bibles , mise-traps , brick-dust , whisker-seed , morrel , pokkerankerchers , and all sorts of swatemaits , including taters , sasseges , and other gardin , baky , zigars , lamp oyle , taykittles , and other intoxikating likkers ; a dale of fruits , hats , zongs , hare oyle , battins , bukkits , grindin stones , and other aitables , korn and bunyon salve and all hardware . I as laid in a large azzortment of

type , dogs' mate , lolipops , ginger beer , matches , and other pikkles , such as hepsom salts , hoysters , Winzer sope , anzetrar . Old rags bort and sold here and nowhere else , new lade heggs by me Boger Giles ; zinging burdes keeped , sich as howles , donkies , paykok , lodsters , crickets , also the stock of a celebrated brayder . Agent for selling guttyporker souls . P . S . I taychers gografy , rithmetic , cowsticks , jimnasticks and other chynee tricks . "

An advertising device which was worthy of the wit of Sancho Panza , appeared in a number of the " Bochdale Spectator , " published during the year 1846 , and is as follows : — " Near the close of the last century , a tailor , who exercised his avocation in Philadelphia , was imposed upon by a person who contrived to get a suit of clothes on credit , and afterwards eloped without paying for them . The account was placed on the poor man ' s books , and soon forgotten . Some

years afterwards he was examining his old records of debt and credit , profit and loss , when his attention was attracted to this account , and all the circumstances attending it came fresh to his mind . Suddenly an odd thought struck him . ' I'll try an experiment , ' said he to himself , ' perhaps I may succeed in catching the rogue , and getting my money . ' He immediately prepared an advertisement , in substance as follows , which he inserted in the ' Philadelphia Gazette' : — ' If J C , who was in Philadelphia about the month of , in the year 1795 , will send his address to the editor of this

paper , he will hear of something to advantage . Printers in the neighbouring states are requested to copy . ' The latter clause was inserted from a vague suspicion that the rogue had taken up his abode in New York . Having instructed the editor not to disclose his name to the debtor if he should call , but to request him to leave his address , the tailor patiently awaited the result of his experiment . In a short time he was informed by a note from the printer that the individual alluded to in the advertisement , having arrived from

New York , might be found at a given place in the city . The tailor lost no time in preparing a transcript of his account , not forgetting to charge interest from the time the debt was incurred . Taking a constable with him , who bore a legal process suited to the occasion , he soon arrived at the lod gings of the debtor . The constable was instructed to stand off at a little distance till a signal should indicate the time for him to approach . The tailor now rang the bell , and when the servant appeared , requested him to inform the gentleman of whom he was in search that a friend wished to

speak with him at the door . The man obeyed the summons , and soon both debtor and creditor were looking each other in the face . ' How do you do ? ' kindly inquired the tailor . 'Perhaps you do not know me ? ' 'I believe I have not had the pleasure of your acquaintance , ' politely answered our hero . ' Do you remember purchasing a suit of clothes several years ago from a poor tailor , and forgetting to pay for them ? ' ' Oh no ! ' said the gentleman , blushing slightly ; ' you must be mistaken in the person . It cannot be me " that you wish to rind , ' ' There is no mistake , you are the very man' I

The Humours Of Advertising.

wished to see . You have on at this very moment the waistcoat that I made for you ; and you will acknowledge it was of good stuff , otherwise it could not have lasted so long ! ' 'Oh yes , ' said tho gentleman , appearing suddenly to recollect himself , ' I do remember now the circumstance to which you allude . Yes , yes ; I had intended to call and settle that little bill before I left Philadelphia , and you may depend on my doing so . I have come here

to take possession of a large amount of property which has fallen to me by will . See ! here is the advertisement which apprised me of my good fortune . ' Here he handed the tailor the New York paper , containing a copy of the advertisement whose history we have given above . The tailor looked at it with imperturbable gravity , and said— ' Yes , I seo you are in good luck ; but as my demand is a small one , I think I must insist on payment before you come into possession of your property . '

The proper signal here brought the constable into the presence of the parties . The swindler was particularly astonished at the appearance of this functionary , who immediately began to execute his part of the drama . ' What 1 ' said the rogue in an angry tone , ' you surely haven't sued me 1 ' ' Yes I have ' replied the tailor , ' and you should be thankful that nothing worse has happened to you . ' ' Come in then , ' said the debtor , finding himself fairly caught , ' and I will pay you , if I must . '

The three went into the house together , and the slippery gentleman having ascertained the amount of the bill , paid it in full . The tailor having signed the receipt placed it in the hands of the late debtor with feelings such as may bo imagined . The swindler took it , and for the first time glanced at the various items of which if was composed . He

said nothing till he came to the last charge , which was ' for advertising , ' when he broke forth— ' Holloa I what's this ? For advertising ? That ' s an odd charge in a tailor's bill . You ' re cheating me I' ' On no , ' coolly replied the tailor , that is right . I have charged you tho cost of publishing the advertisement which you have just showed me . '

Here the swindler demanded , ' Do you mean to say that you caused the publication of that advertisement ? ' ' Truly I did , ' replied the tailor with most provoking coolness . ' Then you told me a falsehood in it , ' quickly retorted the rogue . ' Convince me of that , ' said the tailor , ' and you will find me ready to confess the fault . '

' You said that I should hear something to my advantage if I would come here . ' ' You are mistaken , ' said the tailor , ' I ohly promised that you should hear of something to advantage , and is it not to the advantage of a poor tailor to collect an old debt ? ' ' If I can catch you in the street , ' said the swindler , in the deepest rage , ' I'll give you such a cow-hiding as will not leave the breath in your body '

' Nonsense now , ' said the tailor , ' if you really want to do anything of that kind , we had better step into the back yard , and finish the business at once . ' The rogue was completely nonplussed by the coolness of the tailor , and stood speechless , and almost petrified . ' Now , ' said the tailor good-naturedly , ' let me give you a piece of advice . When , next you have occasion to get a suit of clothes , you had better not attempt to cheat the poor tailor , but pay him honestly ; for then will your conscience not disturb you , and your sleep will be sweet and refreshing . ' " " The Book of Rarities , " by Bro . Edward Roberts P . M .

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